Director Alex Proyas disappoints with whitewashed movie

Photo+Courtesy+culturedvultures.com
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Director Alex Proyas disappoints with whitewashed movie

Photo Courtesy culturedvultures.com

Photo Courtesy culturedvultures.com

Photo Courtesy culturedvultures.com

Photo Courtesy culturedvultures.com

Johnny Mocny, Staff Reporter

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When I was twelve years old, I contracted mono and spent days in bed. In that time, my dog died and I got dumped for a guy named Chad. It was not an easy time, but I would gladly go back and relive those days than sit through Gods of Egypt again.

Few words can be conjured up to accurately depict the pain I felt sitting in this movie theater. I would rather be stabbed in both nipples with my vision obscured by an incontinent baby than watch poor, obviously Caucasian Gerard Butler attempt to play the role of the EGYPTIAN god of darkness in a room entirely made of green screen. The film’s whitewashing is quite evident with multiple characters, and although the situation could have been easily avoided, director Alex Proyas and Lion Gate Entertainment offered public apologies on the matter after facing criticism on social media.

Proyas has made some pretty good movies in the past. The Crow and I, Robot both stick out as fun, entertaining films. He has taken a seven-year hiatus only to return with this fine heaping pile of crap.

Plot? Huh? Oh, I almost forgot about that element of cinema after watching this movie. In Gods of Egypt, Gerard Butler is an evil guy who kills a good guy and a God has to team up with a normal guy to do get stuff done. Yes, my description is vague and unentertaining, but the movie itself does not do much better.

There is a lot of computer-generated imagery (CGI). Like, an unholy amount of CGI. The CGI in Gods of Egypt  is enough to make George Lucas urinate himself in public. As if the overused CGI was not enough on its own, it’s not even high quality CGI. Honestly, it might  secretly be  a comedy. In my head, I like to imagine that it  is a genius commentary on the movie-going public and how we consume poorly made junk that cashes in on the whole God epic genre that has not really ever done well in the past.

But, it is not that. It is simply a bad movie.

Well, anyway, viewing it can be  good time if one sees it with some friends on DVD–  let the roasting begin!

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